As a rule, when I tell people I like to travel, I mean that I like BEING places. What I don’t like is GETTING places, even if it’s only a relatively short trip and even if I’m not doing the driving.

We returned from the in-laws today which meant we had to make a foray onto the Japanese train system. Even at its worst, the system is better than Amtrack, but we had the unfortunate experience of traveling during a phenomenon called “the U-turn Rush”.

The “U-Turn Rush” happens a few times of year at the end of major holidays. All the people who went on holiday, are now going back home. The expressways back up for 24 miles (42ish kilometers) and the trains can reach 200% capacity. Each time this happens, the Japanese press covers the rush as if it’s some kind of news. They send reporters to clogged train platforms and encourage tired travelers to tell their tales of woe. The interviews usually go like this:

Reporter–It was very crowded in the train, I think.
Traveler–Yes, it was very crowded.
Reporter–(to studio) As you can see, it was very crowded in the train.

The truth is, the only newsworthy thing would be if the trains WEREN’T crowded during a U-Turn Rush because that would mean no one had traveled.

What typically happens is Japan Rail sells as many tickets as it can. The reserved seats go quickly and then there’s a Battle Royale for the non-reserved seats. After those are gone, all remaining space in the train serves as standing room only space. I’ve personally been stuck in the little passage between train cars along with several dozen people. Non-reserved ticket holders will even stand in the aisles in the reserved seat cars.

In our case, we managed to get reserved seats on the shinkansen/bullet trains, but our second leg was on a notoriously crowded line. We couldn’t get reserved seats and instead we opted for a much slower local train. The problem with this train is that we end up sitting facing each other, which means my knees start to sing the blues. This train also fills up, but at least features a projection mapping show of sorts during the long series of tunnels on the route.

Even if I have a reserved seat on a train, the seats are not designed for people as tall as I am. Although they have more space between seats, the seats are narrow and a little low. My knees wait a while and then start in on the second verse.

When we finally get home we are drained, even though the trip has only been four hours or so. One of us volunteers to make coffee whilst the other falls asleep on the couch. Luckily, this time, I got to fall asleep.