Category Archives: Japan

Anything That Could Be Wrong Is

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We learned a lot today. It all started with a phone call and a few rejected button presses.

After we added our oldest to our cellphone plan we, as always, discovered a few charges that we are sure were totally an accident/and or, something we weren’t told we’d have to reject or we’d be paying for it. (It’s also possible that the store clerk tapped it in Morse code and we didn’t notice.) We also had to correct our oldest’s name as they’d misspelled her family name (despite our having repeatedly corrected them when they said it wrong).

She Who Must Be Obeyed started pressing buttons on our phone and sighing a lot and then pressing more buttons. After a few minutes she started speaking to someone and that led to a few interesting discoveries.

First, we learned that our cellphone company thinks our phone number is our old number that we haven’t had for over 15 years. That number was acquired via the company I work for but they abandoned that service a couple  years after we started on it and we’ve had a different phone number since then. (This is similar to what happened when I tried to get a new bank card.) That involved a long discussion that took a shocking twist when the lady on the other end of the line insisted on speaking to our oldest.

She Who Must Be Obeyed pointed out that our oldest is only 15 and there was no reason in hell for her to have to get involved with this. That led to our second discovery: apparently during the long process that resulted in a wrong name and “accidental” charges, our oldest’s phone number got listed as the official phone number, essentially making her head of household. This meant they needed her permission to make any changes.

After clearing up that mess, we then added her to a service that lets her use Wi-Fi hot spots provided by our phone provider because they totally require us to do that rather than making it default. That, however, required me to get on the phone and answer several questions to prove that I am who I am even though the person couldn’t see me and all I did was repeat information She Who Must Be Obeyed had already tried to give. (To paraphrase a friend of mine: Could someone please tell me how, HOW, Japan became a major economic power?)

In the end we think we got it all sorted out. We’re sure something else is wrong, but we’ll deal with that when we figure out what it is.

Deservedly Mindless Distraction Day

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In the past, on days like today, I’ve pretended to care. Today I couldn’t be bothered. Today I put my butt in a chair and started playing.

Well, I did something resembling work, sort of. But I did it in a way that allows me to deal with it at another time.

Using the excuse of resting my injured foot, I decided to play a game for a good portion of the day, especially as it was the game’s Asian anniversary weekend and that meant there were lots of special rewards.

That, however, turned into a much longer gaming session than I’d planned, even though I was’t playing particularly well.

At some point, however, I managed to inventory all the ink I have in stock (exact amount: a lot) and then put off doing things that will get it off the floor in the variety room.

This, of course, was the real reason for all the gaming: avoid making decisions. However, I didn’t just play games to do that, also cleaned a pen, which took longer than I though as it had collected gunk from the past and from the ink I was cleaning out. In my defense, it’s one of the pens I plan to sell and I want it in the best shape possible.

At some point during the day I made lunch for myself and our youngest and then told the youngest to do dishes. (I consider this work as it’s my job to teach “self-reliance” and “responsibility” and lots of other polysyllabic words like those.)

Oh, and in keeping with my tradition of watching final episodes of television series, I watched the final episode of Star Trek: Deep Space Nine. That seemed to be an important thing to do today.

Nap Attacks in Odd Positions

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For want of a sofa I fell asleep in my hands at my desk. How I did this I do not know, but I think it was because of my rolled up sleeves.

One thing I’ve noticed as I’ve experimented with upping my carbohydrate intake a bit is that I’m once again starting to get the insulin produced carb crash at work. Today’s manifested itself in odd ways. I set my elbows on my desk and fell asleep sitting up with my face resting in my own palms. I do not know how this was possible except that I must have had the perfect balance of angle and weight distribution. It also helped that it was warm enough that I’d rolled up my sleeves. This prevented my elbows from splaying and my face from dropping to the desk.

It is more or less understood that falling asleep at your desk is acceptable in the office of the school where I work. This is pretty cool, however it was better in the past.

My office in the old building had a pair of sofas that were old and as questionable as the used sofas that end up on the porches of rental properties in college towns. They also were comfortable and it was easy to lay your head back and take a short nap. Other teachers would just lie down and occupy an entire sofa when they napped.

Unfortunately the new office, despite having better lighting, better chairs and less ancient dust, lacks a proper place for a properly questionable sofa. There are a couple sofas out in the main office, but they are way too public. There is also a “rest area” downstairs, but one colleague says it is occupied by janitorial staff and when he walked in the reaction was something like this so he didn’t stay very long.

This means, if we want a nap, we have to sleep at our desks and rely on a lucky convergence of rolled up sleeves and proper angles, or put our heads down and risk drooling on our desks or using our arms as pillows and ending up with odd patterns on our faces.

Or we could go to bed earlier, but that’s not likely to happen.

What Toe On Yonder Desk Breaks

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I didn’t leave the doctor many options so all he did was apply some tape.

Yesterday I mentioned my most recent moments of left foot destruction  and although it was sore and an impressive shade of purple, I had little trouble walking to work (well, I was limping, but it was more annoying than anything else.

On the way home from work, though, I knew something was wrong. The sore toe suddenly developed stabbing pains in places one would not expect stabbing pains (because one totally expects stabbing pains in other places) and I did a short zig zag on the street before finally deciding I’d better go the hospital and get an x-ray even if it meant paperwork and a long wait.

Somehow, and with a little help from a translation app, I managed to fill out all the required forms and then was escorted to the back of the hospital where I turned in a form and waited.

Eventually my name was called and I found myself in front of a young doctor who had me take off my shoe and sock so he could assess the damage. His first reaction was “Damn, that’s nasty.” (Although he said it in a more Japanese “Hmmmm. Yeah. I see.”)

He then poked around on my foot to establish where it was and was not sore and then sent me for an x-ray. After that there was more waiting before he called me in and showed me the inside of left foot. Even my untrained eyes could spot the break which, for the record, doesn’t look as impressive as the break I got a couple decades ago. The break on the “Little Piggie Who Had None” had an obvious angle off the normal toe line. (I was pleased to see, though, how well that had healed.)

Note: the current break is near the inner joint on my left fifth middle phalanx, as if I know what that is.

This led to the next problem. The doctor said there wasn’t much he could do except tape the two little piggies together. A cast was right out and I turned down the flexible metal splint that would probably keep me from wearing shoes. He applied the tape and sent me on my way (although I have to go back for another x-ray one week from today).

I limped home and haven’t done much since I got home. (Yes, I’m exploiting an excuse to be lazy.)

The Pain That Lessened the Pain

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I had my first ink order cancellation today and that meant I had to refund some money. This was disappointing but it probably saved me a lot of pain.

The order started out larger, then got smaller. I’d even agreed to sell a bottle of hard to find ink I’ve been hoarding (note to self: don’t get “high” on own supply). I’ll probably still sell the bottle, but maybe in a different way than I’d planned.

Then, today after part of the order arrived from the store, I packed the box and made ready to go to the post office. However, sometime during the packing process, as I was moving around the house, I engaged in my periodic tradition of smacking the crap out of the Little Piggy Who Went Whee Whee Whee All The Way Home on the corner of a rolling set of desk drawers. This left me with a cut and an impressive bruise (although a couple ice packs helped remove most of the swelling).

Rather than head to the post office, I decided to have lunch (chili, which is the same thing I had for breakfast; long story) and walk to the post office later.

Unfortunately, and luckily, while I was putting off making the painful walk to the post office, I got an email from my customer requesting a refund because an acquaintance of the client’s will be in Japan soon.. As I hadn’t yet mailed the box, I was able to give the refund and make myself look gracious and save myself some pain in the process.

After that I had to brain storm ideas about the best way to get rid of the growing inventory in order to get some extra cash to rebuild the inventory (oddly, that makes sense to me) and add a couple features/bugs to the business. I also want to move a bunch of it before EMS rates go up at the beginning of June.

However, the important part of that brainstorming was that none of the ideas involve putting on shoes and walking anywhere.

(Tell Me Why) I Won’t Like Mondays

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I made a kid stand up today which is not something I usually do during a first class. In my defense, kids usually don’t sleep during the first class.

This was the first Monday I had to teach this school year and the early readings tell me it’s probably going to be my most annoying day. It starts early with a first, second, third period schedule that includes two low level junior high classes and then jumps with only a few minutes’ rest to high school second year. That’s followed by a three hour break and then a sixth period class.

Although this gives me time for lunch and planning, it didn’t star will today.

My first class gave off the “abandon hope all ye who teacheth here” vibe almost as soon as I stepped in the room. Bad classes seem amused by your presence and I had one kid take his time getting sat down. I made a show of watching the time on my watch, which hurried him up a bit but I’m taking bets there is homework in his future (more on that in a future post). After that the class seemed split between those who did the work because it amused them and the “we are not amused” group.

One kid went to sleep about half way through his assignment and after I woke him up he put his head down and tried to go to sleep while I was talking to him. As a result I made him stand up and took his chair. When he sat down during a writing assignment I reminded him to stand up. The hope is that he will remember this little lesson after two or three times of suffering through it. (He won’t, but at this stage in the school year I still have hope.)

The rest of the classes went well although I’d much rather have four classes in a row than have to work three, sit three, work one, especially when my first class is probably going to be bad.

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Pardon the Random Horror Interruptions

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I had several things on the to do list today, some of which involved actual time wasting, but somehow a horror movie got involved. Well, part of it anyway.

Things actually started out well. I followed my morning routine and even deferred the time wasting until a later time while I worked on a different project. I researched information about import/export rules and how to start a company in Japan whilst still having enough money to actually operate the company. I also managed, at some point, to sell some ink.

I also managed to send out a couple emails and do a little reading but, at some point, and for the life of me I don’t remember why, a topic came up (and I don’t even remember the topic) that started one of those stream-of-consciousness random connections fits and that topic, whatever it was, led to Miniskirt Police, the Miniskirt Police website, a quick search to remember the name of Luna Nagai, who at one point was a member of the Miniskirt Police, and then a search for her, which led to the name of a horror movie that I managed to find online, in Japanese, with Spanish subtitles.

The movie is called Tomie: Another Face and is a made-for-tv adaption of a manga about a high school girl whose hobby is getting herself murdered so that she can resurrect and haunt and taunt her killer (or killers). Because I had a lot to do, I only watched bits of the movie to get the general gist. The movie is actually three episodes about Tomie tricking people into killing her. The second segment, when she enters the life of a creepy photographer, is the best and shows off Nagai’s ability to go from innocent, to sexy to creepy, to creepy cute all in a few seconds. (Also keep in mind that Nagai was only 17 when she made that movie making it all a bit more creepy.)

However, that gave way to the official time-wasting of the day and then a longer project to make swatches of different inks to aid in their sales. That took an hour and, hopefully, will payoff some day.

It wasn’t a normal day, but, in its own way, it was a normal Sunday.

 

The Smiley Face of Doom

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I normally don’t get mad at students during a first class, but one student was already pushing buttons. All he did was smile.

If today was a proper indication of what is to come then it appears that Friday is going to be the day that finally causes me to snap. The only good thing is that it’s now three classes spread out over five hours rather than four in a row broken up only by lunch.

The problem is it’s all junior high school. The first class went well even though it’s got a lot of students from my worst class. The Second also went well, even though it’s JHS 1st year. The main advantage I have with that class is that there homeroom teacher is right across the hall and can see in to my room through several large windows. At one point he watched my students give speeches even though there was no way he could hear what was being said.

My last class though, partly because it’s sixth period on Friday may prove to be my undoing. As I was explaining my seating chart and reminding them to remember their seats. a couple kids went “OKAY!” after every thing I said. Another kid was just smiling and nodding in a way that indicated he was, in fact listening, but wasn’t actually happy and didn’t actually care about what I was saying.

Those students are usually the most annoying as they are typically comedian’s in training and think they must do something funny every five minutes or they die. They also only listen to recognize you are talking so they can make a face. Five minutes later they ask their friends what is going on.

The main advantage I have is that the class is the last period on a Friday. This means I have all the time in the world to wipe smiles off of faces. (So to speak.)

 

 

Long Thursdays with Different Levels

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My Thursdays at work will be best described as beginners, beginning to change and become too cool for school.

I started off with junior high school first year students today and this was kind of fun because I suspect I am teaching their first junior high school class. My job, at this point, is to both comfort and horrify. I speak slowly and as clearly as possible whilst maintaining a semblance of natural intonation and rhythm and then horrify with six simple words “I only speak English in class.”

Later I taught junior high school second year students. Most of them are in the transition form boys to young men. They are still tiny, but their voices are cracking and their attitudes are beginning to bleed through. At this age the standard response to anything difficult is laughter and a game with friends. Failing that, sleep is also considered an option.

During summer, most of them will hit their initial growth spurts and return unrecognizable.

The main goal at this point is to show them that both actions an inactions trigger reactions and homework. I also let them know that I’m willing to punish an entire class to get them to turn on one guy. Luckily this class is before the lunch break. This means I have all the time I need to make them rethink their actions.

After lunch I teach high school second year. No longer being the lowest students in the school, they feel mature enough to act childish. Oddly, the school where I work puts the lower class men on the uppermost floor and the upper class men on the lowermost floor. The junior high is the opposite meaning students rise and fall as they progress in school (something like that).

The class today was noisy but manageable and it has students I’ve had trouble with before. They all think they are too cool for my class, which means I may have to hand out some homework, which isn’t cool.

Fifteen Minutes and Out

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I don’t know how I looked, so I’ll assume I looked marvelous. I don’t know how I sounded, so I’ll assume I sounded awesome.

On Monday I ventured to Asakusa to meet some old friends and their shockingly cute children. While I was waiting near Kaminarimon, the main gate of Senso-ji, I was approached by a camera crew and a guy from St. Louis who asked me if I’d like to do them a favor and be on television.

I was hesitant at first because, as I’ve written before, my one experience on television seemed to go well but I ended up looking awful. (I now appreciate how celebrities prefer to be seen only from certain angles and/or from their “good” sides.) Since that interview, and the public viewing of it that ended in snickers and a couple snide comments from the people I was working with, I’ve done my best to avoid television crews, video cameras and security cameras (although the latter is for different reasons than you might think).

The Nippon TV camera crew and the guy from St. Louis asked me if I’d vote on which of the four possible Tokyo Olympics logos I liked best. This involved placing a sticker under my favorite design (Design B, the ring: Before you die, er, win gold, you see the ring) and explaining myself whilst the guy from St. Louis translated.

Unfortunately, when I said that I liked the Paralympic logo a lot and that the ring reminded me of a kamon (note, so did Design A but Design A is ugly and seems to move by itself if you stare at it too long) the reporter began to ask me if Americans would wear anything like that and I said, yeah, maybe, sure, as a lapel pen. He then asked what kind of family would wear such a pin and I said a rich and powerful one and he asked if that mean Japan was rich and powerful and I said of course.

That was the general outline, at least, but there was a lot more than that and at some point I used some Japanese to show my ranking (B, D, C, A). In fact, the interview went on long enough that I’m sure I eventually did and said something foolish.

When it was all over I was told when it would air (the next day) and what time the show started.

When that time rolled around I made a token effort to see if I made the cut. I decided I’d check a couple times and if the segment was on I’d watch it but I wasn’t going to sit and wait for it. I also “forgot” to record it (isn’t that convenient?) as I’d much rather imagine I did better than my first television experience than actually witness what happened.

When I got to the school where I work, the first teacher I saw mentioned he’d seen me on television. A few others did the same. When I got to class a few students had seen me.

They haven’t made any jokes/memes out of me yet, so that means I probably did pretty well. At least that’s what I’ll keep thinking.